This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
