I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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