I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
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