So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
