it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
