Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
