So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
