Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
