fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
