all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
My cat gives me a boner
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Randomize