it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize