i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
