I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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