I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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