She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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