Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
