You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
