so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
he quoted the bible to break up with me
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Randomize
