Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
