Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
