Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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