what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize