This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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