yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I'm just crazy horny about you
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
