I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
This is classic penis vs brain.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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