but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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