Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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