STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
