If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
