doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
