Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
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