but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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