Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
