They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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