and you said cock pushups were impossible
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
