I could make wine with my vomit
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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