Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
