It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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