he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
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