He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize