This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Randomize
