please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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