I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
