He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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