So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
