im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
