whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Plan B is the new Plan A
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
