I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
