He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
