and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
