We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Randomize
