And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i think i have two assholes
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Randomize
